It looked like a bug's eye....

Okay.  Wow.  Talk about a whirlwind of a week.  And some stunning alliteration.  But I digress.....

So morning of surgery, we had to leave at 4am, and considering I went to bed around 245am, I was just a tad bit sleepy, and yet on the two hour ride up to Albany, I don't remember sleeping even a minute.  I think my already jumpy nerves were getting the best of me.  My mouth, already dry since after midnight is NPO (nothing to eat or drink, including gum, tooth brushing, etc), is like cotton.  We get there and dad drops mom and me off to go get started in the admission processing.  We go in, get checked in, and I get taken back into the back to start filling out the medical history stuff.  Then they bring in the nurse to start my i.v. to run the sleepy drugs that are normally given pre-surgery.  As anticipated, it hurt like the dickens and my vein blows.  The nurse goes back and gets the 'sure thing,' a woman who is skilled at getting veins of those who are like me.  The woman comes over, says 'I've had you before, right?' and I said 'yup, so hopefully you'll be able to get it.'  Yeah.  Didn't happen.  So my already frayed nerves at this point are completely shot and I burst into tears.  For me, this was a worst case scenario.  I've never been this on edge prior to surgery, and when my veins aren't even able to be gotten by the expert who has gotten them before, it ups the panic tenfold.  They tell me that they aren't going to run the i.v. until I'm under with the gas anesthesia.  Mom and Dad pray over me, and I'm wheeled away.

I've never been in the operating room fully awake.  Never.  I'm usually on the sleepy time i.v. stuff and passed out drooling by the time I'm wheeled away.  It was such a sense of panic to be back there, flat on my back, looking up and around at the massive sterility that is the OR.  The light overhead has to be a minimum of three feet in diameter, made up of at least (or so it seemed) 100 little lights that I knew would soon be peering down into my abdomen, illuminating all for my surgeons to see.  I swear, it looked like a bug's eye.  And in the midst of my soaking up of my surroundings, Dr. Lee walks over.  Greets me with a good morning and how things have been going.  I told him about the increased issues with my uterus, and he assures me he'll take a look and take good care of me, at which time I break down crying again.  The look on Dr. Lee's face scared me.  He asked why, I told him of my feelings, my fears with this surgery, and asked him to bring me through it all.  He reassured me that I was in good hands with both him and Dr. Polynice and that I'd be fine.  Crying.  To my surgeon.  And in the biggest panic you can imagine.  Dr. Polynice also walks in, Dr. Lee grabs him, pulls him aside, briefs him on my lack on emotional stability, and he also came over and reassured me everything would be fine. 

Still sniffling, I laid back down on the gurney and was strapped down, oxygen mask over my face.  I could hear everyone still talking, hear them say to start the gas through the mask.  Unable to move, gas started getting pumped through.  I don't have many fears in life, but it was scary to sense that I was losing oxygen and it was being replaced by something that was making me feel like I was suffocating.  And while breathing as deeply as being told, I went under.....

On a serious note....

Hey all,

Surgery is going to be at 730am on Wednesday, September 21.  I realize that is 8 hours away from now (when I'm typing this) and that I should probably be in bed, but for any of you that know me, being up at this hour still should come as no surprise.  I'm going into this surgery with much trepidation, and I hope it will go well and I'll actually heal this time.  I've said to some of you earlier and I'll say it again now, if anything happens and I don't make it, know that I've loved you.  I'm hoping that God doesn't think I'm quite done here on earth fixing things/situations/people/churches/weddings/couples/etc and that in no time I'll be back posting. 

My intent (ambitious, I know) is to post from the hospital.  Mom will have my phone, but seeing as it's a new phone since my last big surgery, I have to give her a tutorial on how to operate it to text, so she'll be sending out a general status update on it.  Post surgery, however, I'm hoping to hack into some wifi hotspot (there's a panera now adjacent to the hospital) and do a daily blog update.  I can't guarantee anything with much detail or lucidity, but at least I'll try to check in as best I can. 

I thank each and every one of you for your thoughts and prayers for me, my parents (especially) and the surgical teams that will be working on me.  And with any luck, I'll be back to my sarcastic blogging self in no time, bad jokes and all. 

On a positive note, I've signed up for the warrior dash again next year, as has Rich, and it looks like Sarah WILL be joining us this year too.  Woohoo!!!  Anyone else up for the challenge?  Saturday Aug 11 2012, 9am, Windham Mountain. 

So I'll end this and get my obligatory pre-op shower (no really, it's a requirement) and head to bed, grab a few hours sleep before we leave at 4am to get up there by 530 for my 730 surgery.  Hey, I didn't make the rules :)

Love to all,

B

I've been such a Casper

Wow.  Did I just say that?  And why did it sound like something out of 'Clueless'? 

I've been very absent recently.  Life has taken a beyond hectic turn since right before the dash.  Many of you (I say that as if I have an abundance of followers, when I know that isn't the case) have wondered if I survived the dash, and if so, how did I do.  I shall henceforth update.

Because I'm writing this, it does indeed confirm that I survived the dash but man, was it hard.  Mind you, Rich and I trained a whole lot more than I did last year.  When I talked Rich into doing it with me, I explained everything that went on last year.  What I didn't realize is they'd take last year's event, which I thought was tough, and make it that much harder.  This year's dash was less like last year's and more like a mini Tough Mudder, and I wasn't the only one who thought so. 

I ended up in a pack of guys who also ran last year's, and we were commiserating about the increase in difficulty level from 2010 to 2011.  The organizers of the dash thought it would be so much fun to go even higher on the ski slope this year.  And the obstacles from last year?  Yeah.  They would have been child's play this year.  They took the tire run/high knees thing like football players do, and threw in a few rows of junked cars and large trucks to hurdle over in between the 4 rows of tires.  And the 4' high walls from last year?  This year, they were a bit higher and you had to palm over them with upper body strength and then duck under barbed wire walls, about 4 rows of them.  The swamp trudge was complicated by massive logs strung on tension through the middle that you had to hurdle over.  There was this teeter totter thingie that was about 15 feet up in the air that you had to go up and then partway down and back up and then fully down, and it had little rungs on it.  The problem is that it was only about a 2x6x12 so it wasn't that wide and from the height it was a little daunting if you fell off onto the rocky terrain.  Hmmm.  What else.  Oh, the cargo nets took some crack cocaine and beefed up, they made a horizontal one you had to scramble over which was difficult.  There was a forest of tires that swung and hit hard when the person ahead of you pushed them out of the way and you got them on the back swing.  And the worst part?  Instead of going up the ski slope, across a tad, and then back down, they started the down, and went back up, and then down, and then back up and then down, and then back up and then down, and just for fun back up before the final down.  My legs tried to detach themselves and hop the ski lift down at one point.  There were a few more crazy things that aren't popping into memory right now, but needless to say it was hard.

In spite of the changes to the course and the much more difficult obstacles I finished in: 55:16!!!!!  I knocked a full 6 minutes off my time from last year.  I couldn't have been any happier.  I swore it took me an hour and a half, but when Mom and Dad said I came in at under an hour, and then my shoe tag confirmed it, I was amazed.  Rich came in about 3 minutes ahead of me which was the exact same pace/distance we kept during our training, so it definitely paid off. 

We were muddy, tired, sweaty, slightly out of breath, but overall happy.  And like the crazies we are, we're signing up for next year again.  Actually, I already did and Rich is doing it soon.  It's going to be my incentive/inspiration for a speedy healing.  Our goal in 2012?  To knock another 5 minutes off of our times.  And if I REALLY heal up, we're going to try for Tough Mudder in November 2012 too.  I think Rich caught the adrenalin junkie bug too :) 

If you want to view pics (though this year's photography company SUCKED) go to http://www.sportphoto.com/ look for the warrior dash series.  Click on the 2011 Windham WD Saturday August 13
When prompted to enter bib number, put in 80604.  They keep threatening to archive the pics, so if you want to see them, look before Sept 23. 

I'll post a 'rest of August/pre surgery update' hopefully tomorrow.  Love to all and thanks for the well wishes. 

Hugs,

B