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Okay. Wow. Talk about a whirlwind of a week. And some stunning alliteration. But I digress.....
So morning of surgery, we had to leave at 4am, and considering I went to bed around 245am, I was just a tad bit sleepy, and yet on the two hour ride up to Albany, I don't remember sleeping even a minute. I think my already jumpy nerves were getting the best of me. My mouth, already dry since after midnight is NPO (nothing to eat or drink, including gum, tooth brushing, etc), is like cotton. We get there and dad drops mom and me off to go get started in the admission processing. We go in, get checked in, and I get taken back into the back to start filling out the medical history stuff. Then they bring in the nurse to start my i.v. to run the sleepy drugs that are normally given pre-surgery. As anticipated, it hurt like the dickens and my vein blows. The nurse goes back and gets the 'sure thing,' a woman who is skilled at getting veins of those who are like me. The woman comes over, says 'I've had you before, right?' and I said 'yup, so hopefully you'll be able to get it.' Yeah. Didn't happen. So my already frayed nerves at this point are completely shot and I burst into tears. For me, this was a worst case scenario. I've never been this on edge prior to surgery, and when my veins aren't even able to be gotten by the expert who has gotten them before, it ups the panic tenfold. They tell me that they aren't going to run the i.v. until I'm under with the gas anesthesia. Mom and Dad pray over me, and I'm wheeled away.
I've never been in the operating room fully awake. Never. I'm usually on the sleepy time i.v. stuff and passed out drooling by the time I'm wheeled away. It was such a sense of panic to be back there, flat on my back, looking up and around at the massive sterility that is the OR. The light overhead has to be a minimum of three feet in diameter, made up of at least (or so it seemed) 100 little lights that I knew would soon be peering down into my abdomen, illuminating all for my surgeons to see. I swear, it looked like a bug's eye. And in the midst of my soaking up of my surroundings, Dr. Lee walks over. Greets me with a good morning and how things have been going. I told him about the increased issues with my uterus, and he assures me he'll take a look and take good care of me, at which time I break down crying again. The look on Dr. Lee's face scared me. He asked why, I told him of my feelings, my fears with this surgery, and asked him to bring me through it all. He reassured me that I was in good hands with both him and Dr. Polynice and that I'd be fine. Crying. To my surgeon. And in the biggest panic you can imagine. Dr. Polynice also walks in, Dr. Lee grabs him, pulls him aside, briefs him on my lack on emotional stability, and he also came over and reassured me everything would be fine.
Still sniffling, I laid back down on the gurney and was strapped down, oxygen mask over my face. I could hear everyone still talking, hear them say to start the gas through the mask. Unable to move, gas started getting pumped through. I don't have many fears in life, but it was scary to sense that I was losing oxygen and it was being replaced by something that was making me feel like I was suffocating. And while breathing as deeply as being told, I went under.....
So morning of surgery, we had to leave at 4am, and considering I went to bed around 245am, I was just a tad bit sleepy, and yet on the two hour ride up to Albany, I don't remember sleeping even a minute. I think my already jumpy nerves were getting the best of me. My mouth, already dry since after midnight is NPO (nothing to eat or drink, including gum, tooth brushing, etc), is like cotton. We get there and dad drops mom and me off to go get started in the admission processing. We go in, get checked in, and I get taken back into the back to start filling out the medical history stuff. Then they bring in the nurse to start my i.v. to run the sleepy drugs that are normally given pre-surgery. As anticipated, it hurt like the dickens and my vein blows. The nurse goes back and gets the 'sure thing,' a woman who is skilled at getting veins of those who are like me. The woman comes over, says 'I've had you before, right?' and I said 'yup, so hopefully you'll be able to get it.' Yeah. Didn't happen. So my already frayed nerves at this point are completely shot and I burst into tears. For me, this was a worst case scenario. I've never been this on edge prior to surgery, and when my veins aren't even able to be gotten by the expert who has gotten them before, it ups the panic tenfold. They tell me that they aren't going to run the i.v. until I'm under with the gas anesthesia. Mom and Dad pray over me, and I'm wheeled away.
I've never been in the operating room fully awake. Never. I'm usually on the sleepy time i.v. stuff and passed out drooling by the time I'm wheeled away. It was such a sense of panic to be back there, flat on my back, looking up and around at the massive sterility that is the OR. The light overhead has to be a minimum of three feet in diameter, made up of at least (or so it seemed) 100 little lights that I knew would soon be peering down into my abdomen, illuminating all for my surgeons to see. I swear, it looked like a bug's eye. And in the midst of my soaking up of my surroundings, Dr. Lee walks over. Greets me with a good morning and how things have been going. I told him about the increased issues with my uterus, and he assures me he'll take a look and take good care of me, at which time I break down crying again. The look on Dr. Lee's face scared me. He asked why, I told him of my feelings, my fears with this surgery, and asked him to bring me through it all. He reassured me that I was in good hands with both him and Dr. Polynice and that I'd be fine. Crying. To my surgeon. And in the biggest panic you can imagine. Dr. Polynice also walks in, Dr. Lee grabs him, pulls him aside, briefs him on my lack on emotional stability, and he also came over and reassured me everything would be fine.
Still sniffling, I laid back down on the gurney and was strapped down, oxygen mask over my face. I could hear everyone still talking, hear them say to start the gas through the mask. Unable to move, gas started getting pumped through. I don't have many fears in life, but it was scary to sense that I was losing oxygen and it was being replaced by something that was making me feel like I was suffocating. And while breathing as deeply as being told, I went under.....
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